The only reason I lost to Aldo Montoya was the intoxicating fumes there were coming off his body from being around Jake Roberts.

When most people get drunk, they see snakes. But, when snakes get drunk, they see Jake Roberts!

It's not often that you see a smile on the face of the Viper, but it actually looks good on there.

Why don't you slip into something more comfortable? Like a coma.

Jake Robert's wife is real ugly, but according to him that's nothing a six pack and a light switch can't fix.

Speaking of birthday suits, I think Mae Young's needs ironing!

What's twelve inches long and hangs in front on ass, Mankind's tie.