You know how I impress girls at the gym? I do pull ups: I pull up in a Corvette, in a Cadillac, and in a Mercedes.

Her, Me, whipped cream, handcuffs. Any questions?

If the Japanese are so smart, why do they eat with sticks?

You lost weight? Look around, you'll find it.

Are you ready for some puppies?!

When it comes to Shawn Michaels, there's always a way.

Panties aren't the greatest thing in the world, but they're next to them.