I really am opinionated, but not for long. I have found myself coming off of what I think of something because the guy I'm talking to makes better sense than I am. I have so many points of view, I can't keep track of 'em, because I talk to too many people... I'm not so opinionated that I won't budge.

Comedy is a man in trouble. And without it, there's no humor.

I never tell an audience what they can expect. I never have and I never will. I'm an entertainer for 75 years.

I really am opinionated, but not for long. I have found myself coming off of what I think of something because the guy I'm talking to makes better sense than I am. I have so many points of view, I can't keep track of 'em, because I talk to too many people... I'm not so opinionated that I won't budge.

You may catch more flies with honey than vinegar, but you'll get them to work harder if you use a flyswatter.

When I was onstage doing the work, adrenaline killed the pain because I never hurt in front of an audience.

Don't you understand how dramatic it is to be a comic? To be a fool, to get people to laugh at this show-off? Milton Berle could take Laurence Olivier and stick him under the table if he wanted to. And so could I.