I have a nice bookshelf in my office, but not my house. I'm crass, but not that crass.

Introducing 'Lite': the new way to spell 'Light'; but with twenty per cent fewer letters.

Where lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not color, but to accept God's final word on where your lips end.

There's nothing more fun than entertaining kids.

The whole object of comedy is to be yourself and the closer you get to that, the funnier you will be.

People have an infinite attention span if you are entertaining them.

I can't go to a bad movie by myself. What, am I gonna make sarcastic remarks to strangers?