Maybe if we lie down our brains will work.

And that's when I realized, when you're a kid you don't need a costume, you ARE superman.

I didn't know every day I would be discussing the tone of my voice with my wife. I thought it was a marriage. Apparently, it's a musical.

You know, crankiness is at the essence of all comedy.

You can tell what was the best year of your father's life, because they seem to freeze that clothing style and ride it out.

I love the day date. No wine, no shower.

Can't you at least die with a little dignity?