I know there are kids out there, I want to make sure they all know that driving without braking is not something I recommend, unless you have professional clown training or a comedy background, as I do. It is not something I plan to make a habit.

Why would you want to work for a living if you could just joke around? Being a celebrity expands your commercial possibilities.

You know how your charger for your phone? It's like if you had a charger for your whole body and mind

Most people, you do a TV series, it ends three, four, five years later; it's a relic.

It reminds me of like this pathetic friend that everybody had when they were a little kid who would let you borrow any of his stuff if you would just be his friend. That's what the library is. A government funded pathetic friend.

Well, sometimes we do actually have to get up early, but a man will always trade sleep for sex.

Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun. You don't stare at it, it's too risky. You get a sense of it and then you look away.