Wise is what you want to be. Smart is easy compared to wise.

Have you ever noticed how they keep improving your laundry detergent, but they still can't get those blue flakes out? Why do we trust them to get our clothes clean? These guys can't even get the DETERGENT white!

Why does McDonald's have to count every burger that they sell? What is their ultimate goal? Do they want cows to surrender voluntarily?

The padded outfits, the bad scripts, the phony-looking sets... he dealt with it all. He had to. He was Superman.

But I don't want to be a pirate!

If someone's lying, are their pants really on fire

Ever noticed that no matter what happens in one day, it exactly fits in the newspaper?