It's kind of hard to articulate, but, like, this notion of mercy, forgiveness, was very appealing for me. It was very profound. And it had a deep impact, and I think it still does.

Without Valentine's Day, February would be... well, January.

There are different parts of us. You want to feel safe but you want to also feel challenged.

No one goes into standup to make money. The frustration and rejection are just too much.

I'm definitely hesitant wearing shorts during the summer. Like for a pale person, you know, summer - everyone in the world is so excited for summer, but pale people, we're just like, oh no.

Why would a lazy guy become a parent of five? Then again, why would creative people who inherently don't like change and criticism become writers, actors, or comedians? There's something about this process. I joke about it: My kids have made me a better person, and I only need, like, 34 more of them to be a really good guy.

I'd have to say Sunset Salsa. Nothing against Honey Lime, but it's for losers.