That's not to say that I'm a well-informed Catholic. I'm still in idiot.

Stand-up used to be much more of a form combat. Heckling was much more common [in the '90s]. And I couldn't get stage time, and so I would go out to Pip's in Sheepshead Bay.

My goal in life is to be as happy as a studio audience.

Anyone know if the shuttles to Hell will have Wifi? Asking for a friend.

Comedians kind of write what comes to them. You can give yourself little assignments, but it's what inspires you. So I feel like with food, it is a passion of mine. It's where my sensibility rests. I love topics that are universal, and I love stuff that doesn't alienate people.

What kind of life are you leading where you consider ketchup fancy? "Well, we ain't rich folk, but on special occasions, I'll break out the ketchup. Grandma's birthday, make her feel special"

Other people's children's birthday parties are the most joyful events you will ever resent having to attend.