I went to a Catholic University and there's something about being a Catholic-American. You know, St. Patrick's Day is, I'm Irish-Catholic. There's alcoholism in my family. It's like I've got to be Catholic, right?

Babies, they learn how to walk and they are already trying to run away. You can't reach the doorknob, you only know us, think it through.

The entertainment business is such a strange, crazy perception business that you're either given way too much respect, like people saying, "You should be the head of the sitcom!" Or you're given no respect, where they're like, "You should audition to be the garbage man that lives four houses down."

The Pearly Gates. Am I the only one who finds it odd that Heaven has gates? What kind of neighborhood is Heaven in?

The hardest part of the day is all the stuff after I open my eyes in the morning.

I always imagine that if I met Dr. Seuss, he would be very similar to Crispin Glover.

I wouldn't say that comedy brought me away from it.I think that my idea of faith was another obligation in my life.