My faith is very personal. It's not something that I want to project on other people.

Babies and toddlers are mostly what I've been exposed to at this point. I'm hoping parenting just gets much easier after this. It does, right?

If someone picks up one thing you've written, you want them to go, 'Wow, this is pretty good.'

I love the impatience of New York... You ever had somebody not ask you for directions, but demand them? You're just innocently walking down the street, you hear a horn, all of a sudden some guy's like, 'HOLLAND TUNNEL!!!' ...You know, like you were supposed to fax this guy directions. Suddenly, you're wasting HIS time.

Deep frying a Twinkie makes it healthy, right?

When our bed is made, it's covered in 40 pillows-like we're stockpiling ammo for the global pillow fight.

I need the concept of mercy for me to have some semblance of self-admiration. So in real life, I'm probably somebody who is more devout.