New York has made me so paranoid, too. Whenever I visit another city, I always act like I'm from there, so the cab driver doesn't rip me off. I'm always like, "Yeah, it's good to be back home. Back here where I grew up. Yeah. Here in Tokyo. ... Uh, driver, I need to go to my old stomping grounds. That would be the Holiday Inn. And the address appears to be the pound sign."

This city has so many beautiful women. I fall in love like every ten minutes, I'm sitting on the subway, I'm like, "There's my wife... there she is - oh, she's getting off. All right, there's the woman - all right, that's a man."

I was the youngest of six kids, so yeah, feeding myself was important, but it's not like I was obsessed with food growing up.

I think I grew up with the idea that God was a punishing being, constructed around rules.

Bacon is like the opposite of medicine. It's like, "Take that, Lipitor."

I didn't choose to be the guy who talks about the mundane - it's just who I am and it's what kind of works for me.

The Pearly Gates. Am I the only one who finds it odd that Heaven has gates? What kind of neighborhood is Heaven in?