You ever read an article, and at the bottom, it says, 'Continued on page six'? I'm , 'Not for me. I'm done.'

Don't you think it's strange how many referees work at Footlocker?

Now don't get me wrong, I love animals, but I like eatin' 'em more... fun to pet, better to chew.

I love sleep. I need sleep. We all do, of course. There are those people that don't need sleep. I think they're called 'successful.

How'd we come up with the robe? Was some guy just like, 'Hey, I've got an idea! Why don't we make a coat out of a towel? You can have a little belt that goes around. You could dunk the belt in the toilet! Have a toilet belt.'

I don't want to get involved in the culture war. Religion's iffy.

Imagine you're drowning, and someone hands you a baby.