The only time the press doesn’t sensationalize information is when one of their own is kidnapped. Interesting how they show restraint then.

I don't wear rubbers cause you can't catch it twice.

I don't have kids. That's why I leave it in the dumper or in the mouth, because I hate kids.

People don't mind positive stereotypes. People don't mind positive assumptions. It's only negative assumptions about them. So their outrage is so arbitrary.

I'd rather hug Magic Johnson after he rolled around in barbed wire.

I don't pull out because... it's not my problem.

I wish I had AIDS so I could bite somebody.