What a coincidence, they both go to College and I'm a rapist!

I had a three year relationship end. Ever have somebody just freak out on you in a relationship? Things are going great. After three years she wants to run out and find a guy that doesn't hit her.

Why is comedy the only form of the arts where people think they have to agree with or approve the content? You don't walk through a museum with a towel and throw it over paintings you don't like.

I wish I had AIDS so I could bite somebody.

I hope you have a miscarriage on a Walmart floor and have the baby's room already decorated.

I had AIDS, but I beat it with Advil.

What's the name of the birth defect you have, trampled by a horse during the 2nd trimester?