Why should a woman cook? So her husband can say 'My wife makes a delicious cake' to some hooker?

"I wouldn't go over here to Lisa Rinna and I would say 'Are those breasts real, are you wearing underwear?'"

to maintain success, stamina is more important than talent. You have to learn to be a marathon runner.

Your proudest moment is to watch your egg not just function, but to achieve on her own.

The glass is always half empty. All good comedians are manic-depressive.

old age' is always ten years more than we are.

Life is very tough, you know. You sit at a dinner party and talk to the person on your right or your left, you're going to hear something terribly sad, or horrible, or awful. And you just laugh at everything. I think it was Winston Churchill who said something like, any time you get someone to laugh, you're giving them a little vacation. It's so true. You laugh for one second, you're happy. I find in negotiations, everybody's sitting around looking so serious, I say something funny and it breaks the ice. And it's like, now we can get through this.