I hate reality shows that are not reality.
She's so pure, Moses couldn't even part her knees.
The first rule of survival is: Make your own rules. The hell anyone thinks about the way you're acting; listen only to yourself.
She's so fat, she's my two best friends.
Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes had the baby. He was there for the birth. It would've been nice if he was there for the conception.
Last night I asked my husband, 'What's your favorite sexual position?' and he said, 'Next door.'