One of the most rebellious things a woman can do is allow people to think she’s mean.

My husband wanted to be cremated. I told him I'd scatter his ashes at Neiman Marcus - that way, I'd visit him every day.

I said to my husband, 'Why don't you call out my name when we're making love?' He said, 'I don't want to wake you up.'

You know you're getting old when you buy a sexy sheer nightgown and don't know anyone who can see through it.

Something terrific will come no matter how dark the present.

I was so ugly that my parents sent my picture to 'ripley's believe it or not' - they sent it back and said, "we don't believe it."

In life the only thing that you can expect is the unexpected; the only surprise is a day that has none.