Don't tell your kids you had an easy birth or they won't respect you. For years I used to wake up my daughter and say, 'Melissa you ripped me to shreds. Now go back to sleep.'.

Every television show you go on is a choice.

You're college graduates now, so use your education. Remember: It's not who you know, it's whom.

My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on.

After we made love he took a piece of chalk and made an outline of my body.

People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.

Does fashion matter? Always - though not quite as much after death.