This country has a mental health problem disguised as a gun problem, and a tyranny problem disguised as a security problem.

I think stand is better now than it's ever been. I think it's the greatest time ever to do standup comedy.

I always do that at the end of shows, like a Q&A session. First of all it lets people know that this isn't some preprogrammed, press-play show where I have to say the exact same words in the exact same order. That's part of the thing with live comedy is that people like the fun aspect of it and I enjoy the taking questions part.

Your body's really only meant to compete at the highest levels of combat sports for a few years.

I always try to look at conflicts from as many different angles as is humanly possible, and in a lot of ways there is no one answer.

I really feel like it's a travesty to make a child famous. I really do.

Selling your life to sit in a box and work for a machine. An uncaring machine that demands productivity that doesn't understand you and doesn't want to understand you... There's no natural behaviour. Everyone is wearing clothes they don't want to wear. Everybody is showing up and doing something they don't want to do. They have no connection to it. That's the problem with our society.