As a longtime practitioner of yoga and a person who's been involved in physical fitness my whole life, I can tell you, yoga helps you achieve altered states of consciousness. It is not just stretching. The only way you can say that it's stretching is if you haven't done it, or that you haven't done it rigorously for a long period of time.

The only time I commit to conspiracy theories is when something way retarded happens. Like Lee Harvey Oswald acting alone.

Most of my bits are long stream-of-consciousness- type things, and when I'm doing them onstage, other places to take the theme or idea will hit me, and I just go with it.

I never in my wildest imagination dreamed that I would somehow become a sports commentator.

I talk so much about sex that girls just want to meet me.

When I first went onstage I even had a suit jacket on with the sleeves rolled up because that's what I saw on TV or at the Improv that everybody did.

Life is strange. You keep moving and keep growing. Before you know it, you look back and think, "What was that?"