If you ever start taking things too seriously, just remember that we are talking monkeys on an organic spaceship flying through the universe.

Despite all the advancements in science, and all things about religion that are disproved it still marches on. The bottom line is that the only real, absolutely provable answers about life and our place in the universe are provided by science, and religion has been holding down science since day one.

I never in my wildest imagination dreamed that I would somehow become a sports commentator.

People for the most part can smell lies, at least I thought that until I saw audiences applaud at Carlos Mencia.

Also I can come up with new bits - people yell stuff out and it's a new subject or a subject that I've been thinking about that I haven't done onstage yet and I'll just run with it.

When I first went onstage I even had a suit jacket on with the sleeves rolled up because that's what I saw on TV or at the Improv that everybody did.

People love to see people fall.