The British fans are liable to suddenly be talking to you about something that you don't know how you got into the conversation. I think it's something to do with the fact that they've been watching you for so many years sort of you telling your story.

To be creative you must create a space for yourself where you can be undisturbed... separate from everyday concerns.

If life were fair, Dan Quayle would be making a living asking 'Do you want fries with that?'

When you've been doing comedy for forty years, you really do know most of the jokes. And even if you don't know a specific joke, you can pretty much guess what it's going to be.

If I can get you to laugh with me, you like me better, which makes you more open to my ideas. And if I can persuade you to laugh at the particular point I make, by laughing at it you acknowledge its truth.

The writing is the most important bit, and performing it is just closing the circle because I'm less likely to screw it up than anyone else.

You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him enter regional distribution codes in data field 97 to facilitate regression analysis on the back end.