Net neutrality: The only two words that promise more boredom in the English language are 'featuring Sting,'

You don't need people’s opinion on a fact. You might as well have a poll asking: ‘Which number is bigger, 15 or 5?’ or ‘Do owls exist?’ or ‘Are there hats?'

The Confederate flag is one of those things that should only be seen on t-shirts, belt buckles and bumper stickers to help the rest of us identify the worst people in the world.

Americans just don't understand dry wit.

I guess the tone of jokes is often, at best, irreverent, but it always comes from a place of deep love.

I would hate to meet myself at 15.

Once you learn how to make people laugh, then you get to choose exactly how you want to make them laugh.