Net neutrality: The only two words that promise more boredom in the English language are 'featuring Sting,'

When I heard that Hitler had problems with flatulence, it's funny. What - does that make him a funny man? No. It means he had funny moments when his rear end was speaking louder than his mouth.

You don't really know when stand-up material is TV ready; it's just at what point you're willing to let it go and not work on it anymore. I'm not sure there is a point at which you think: 'And that is finished.'

People, I guess, generally come to see me do stand-up with a working knowledge of my broad sense of humor on The Daily Show ... I don't think anyone would mistake me as an actual anchor.

Sometimes it's good to remember how bad food can be, so you can enjoy the concept of flavour to the fullest.

When you're doing stand-up, you want to stand onstage and, to the extent that you can, uncomplicatedly entertain.

Politics has become infused with narcissism in America.