Economics is like the Dutch language - I'm told it makes sense, but I have my doubts.

There's never any time I think I'm a real journalist, because I don't have any of the qualifications or the intentions for that.

I get nostalgic for British negativity. There is an inherent hope and positive drive to New Yorkers. When you go back to Britain, everybody is just running everything down. It's like whatever the opposite of a hug is.

I realize how desperate it sounds for me, as a comedian, to ask you to laugh at my jokes.

Florida, just because you're shaped like some combination of a gun and a d*ck doesn't mean you have to act that way.

I did sketch comedy, but I never did improv. So I've just tried to learn as I go.

Attending a Sarah Palin rally was simultaneously one of the strangest and most chilling events of my life.