Economics is like the Dutch language - I'm told it makes sense, but I have my doubts.

When you see people say crazy things on our show, they mean this stuff,and that's easy to forget: They're not joking.

There's never any time I think I'm a real journalist, because I don't have any of the qualifications or the intentions for that.

Australia turns out to be a sensational place, albeit one of the most comfortably racist places I've ever been in. They've really settled into their intolerance like an old resentful slipper.

Pumpkin spice lattes are egg nog for morning people.

People are always going to say stupid things, and you're always going to be able to make jokes about that, but it should be the last thing you add in, because it's the easiest thing.

Mr. President, no one is saying you broke any laws, we're just saying it's a little bit weird you didn't have to.