I get sick of that old rationalization, "We're staying together because of the children." Kids couldn't be more miserable living with parents who can't stand each other. They're far better off if there's an honest, clean divorce.

Egyptian President Sadat had a belly dancer entertain President Nixon at a state dinner. Mr. Nixon was really impressed. He hadn't seen contortions like that since Rose Mary Woods.

Some sad news from Australia... the inventor of the boomerang grenade died today.

I'm an entertainer, not a commentator. If you're a comedian your job is to make people laugh.

Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.

As you all know by now, this is the 51st annual Academy Awards. Two hours of sparkling entertainment spread out over a four-hour show.

Air Canada. That's a good name for a Canadian airline.