Baldness is visually enough of a stigma as it is without a big sweaty bloke on stage pointing it out.

I love the way my weight fluctuates in the newspapers. It was 18 stone and then people look at a bad picture of me and add a few more stone on. I think the highest was 22 stone.

I avoid any kind of organised trips as that's one of my bugbears.

I used to be good with kids, but as I get older, I'm grumpy and terrible with them. As for doing a gig at a 6-year old's birthday party, you couldn't pay me enough.

For the greater good, I thought I should be a spiritual leader for people for some reason.

It is easy for me to love myself, but for ladies to do it is another question altogether.

I had a massive amount of self-belief when I did stand-up.