The unfortunate, yet truly exciting thing about your life, is that there is no core curriculum. The entire place is an elective.

There's a disconnect there between - you're telling me this [war in Iraq] is fight of our generation, and you're going to increase troops by 10 percent. And that's gonna do it. I'm sure what [George W.Bush] would like to do is send 400,000 more troops there, but he can't, because he doesn't have them.

It's the same argument people say about the blogs. The blogs are responsible. No, they're not. The blogs are like anything else. You judge each one based on its own veracity and intelligence and all of that.

As we approach the millennium with sort of the idea that society is going to start spiraling into chaos, I'd love to be making jokes about that. Who wants to miss out on that? If the world is going to end, I want to be there the night before, goofing off.

Megachurches. I can't be the only one frightened when our houses of worship sound like they could take on Godzilla.

President Bush announced we're going to Mars, which means he's given up on Earth.

In whose delusional mind is democracy made 'better' by allowing wealthy people to control more of it?