Models talk to you for six minutes and they're very nice and they say thank you and then it's off to the larger European men they actually have sex with.

If the world does need to repopulate at some point, the announcing team of Rob Lowe and Sofia Vergara, I think, would make very pleasant children.

I mean, I'm not hoping for the apes and the monolith. I'm hoping for controlled chaos to assist us.

I think of myself as a comedian who has the pleasure of writing jokes about things that I actually care about, and that's really it. I have great respect for people who are in the front lines and the trenches of trying to enact social change, but I am far lazier than that.

Sarah Palin has been tagged and released back into the wild.

I'm also interviewing a guy who's just written a book about his experience living in Iraq, faced with the type of violence as he said, an unimaginable scale. And I think that the combination of that is very hard to shake.

I like not to be good at anything, so I keep hopping around.