To say I have played through four World Cups, two Lions tours, 91 international games and a ridiculous number of injuries and other setbacks gives me an incredibly special feeling of fulfilment. I know myself well enough to know that I will never truly be satisfied.

We need to ask ourselves what are we here for and what have we worked so hard to be here for.

When you're obsessive, like me, searching for something unattainable can become unhealthy ... it's like falling through the air and grabbing at the clouds.

I only get the points because I have team-mates who do the work and put me in the position to get them.

I refuse to go into a fast-food outlet - to use the toilet even - in case anyone got the wrong idea and thought I was sneaking in a quick burger.

I want to be more than just some guy who played in a World Cup final.

The conversation topic in my head is not what role I should play; it is whether I am going to play at all.