A good reliable set of bowels is worth more to a man than any quantity of brains.

The man who gets bit twice by the same dog is better adapted for that kind of business than any other.

Wise men have but few confidants, and cunning ones none.

If you would make yourself agreeable wherever you go, listen to the grievances of others but never relate your own.

A learned fool is one who has read everything and simply remembered it.

Men are seldom underrated; the mercury in a man finds its true level in the eyes of the world just as certainly as it does in the glass of a thermometer.

Put an Englishman into the garden of Eden, and he would find fault with the whole blasted concern; put a Yankee in, and he would see where he could alter it to advantage; put an Irishman in, and he would want to boss the thing; put a Dutchman in, and he would proceed to plant it.