Advice is like castor oil — easy enough to give but dreadful hard to take.
Truth is the edict of God.
The time to pray is not when we are in a tight spot but just as soon as we get out of it.
One of the best temporary cures for pride and affectation is seasickness; a man who wants to vomit never puts on airs.
The best medicine I know for rheumatism is to thank the Lord that it ain't gout.
Put an Englishman into the garden of Eden, and he would find fault with the whole blasted concern; put a Yankee in, and he would see where he could alter it to advantage; put an Irishman in, and he would want to boss the thing; put a Dutchman in, and he would proceed to plant it.