Life โฆ is a bit like reading. โฆ If all your responses to a book have already been duplicated and expanded upon by a professional critic, then what point is there to your reading? Only that itโs yours. Similarly, why live your life? Because itโs yours. But what if such an answer becomes less and less convincing?
Julian BarnesYou put together two things that have not been put together before. And the world is changed.
Julian BarnesPeople in love, it is well known, suffer extreme conceptual delusions, the most common of these being that other people find your condition as thrilling and eye-watering as you do yourselves.
Julian BarnesAnd no, it wasn't shame I now felt, or guilt, but something rarer in my life and stronger than both: remorse. A feeling which is more complicated, curdled, and primeval. Whose chief characteristic is that nothing can be done about it: too much time has passed, too much damage has been done, for amends to be made.
Julian BarnesHe had a better mind and a more rigorous temperament than me; he thought logically, and then acted on the conclusion of logical thought. Whereas most of us, I suspect, do the opposite: we make an instinctive decision, then build up an infrastructure of reasoning to justify it. And call the result common sense.
Julian BarnesI'm interested in such things as the difference between how we perceive the world and what the world turns out to be. The difference is between the stories we tell others and the stories we tell ourselves. There is a wonderful Russian saying, which I use as the epigraph of one of my novels, which goes, He lies like an eyewitness. Which is very sly, clever and true.
Julian BarnesWhat is the easiest, the most comfortable thing for a writer to do? To congratulate the society in which he lives: to admire its biceps, applaud its progress, tease it endearingly about its follies.
Julian BarnesHow rarely do our emotions meet the object they seem to deserve? How hopelessly we signal; how dark the sky; how big the waves. We are all lost at sea, washed between hope and despair, hailing something that may never come to rescue us.
Julian BarnesGrief seems at first to destroy not just all patterns, but also to destroy a belief that a pattern exists.
Julian BarnesWHORES. Necessary in the nineteenth century for the contraction of syphilis, without which no one could claim genius.
Julian BarnesIt strikes me that this may be one of the differences between youth and age: when we are young, we invent different futures for ourselves; when we are old, we invent different pasts for others.
Julian BarnesIf these are indeed the spirits of Englishmen and Englishwomen who have passed over into the next world, surely they would know how to form a proper queue?
Julian BarnesParis is certainly one of the most boastful of cities, and you could argue that it has had a lot to boast about: at various times the European centre of power, of civilisation, of the arts, and (self-advertisingly, at least) of love.
Julian BarnesThis was long before the term 'single-parent family' came into use; back then it was a 'broken home'.
Julian BarnesWomen scheme when they are weak, they lie out of fear. Men scheme when they are strong, they lie out of arrogance.
Julian BarnesWomen were brought up to believe that men were the answer. They weren't. They weren't even one of the questions.
Julian BarnesThere is a German word, Sehnsucht, which has no English equivalent; it means 'the longing for something'. It has Romantic and mystical connotations; C.S. Lewis defined it as the 'inconsolable longing' in the human heart for 'we know not what'. It seems rather German to be able to specify the unspecifiable. The longing for something - or, in our case, for someone.
Julian BarnesAnd if you had no tongue, no celebrating language, youโd do this: cross your hands at the wrist with palms facing towards you; place your crossed wrists over your heart (the middle of your chest, anyway); then move your hands outwards a short distance, and open them towards the object of your love. Itโs just as eloquent as speech.
Julian BarnesSome of the freckles I once loved are now closer to liver spots. But itโs still the eyes we look at, isnโt it? Thatโs where we found the other person, and find them still.
Julian BarnesWhen I was still quite young I had a complete presentiment of life. It was like the nauseating smell of cooking escaping from a ventilator: you don't have to have eaten it to know that it would make you throw up.
Julian BarnesPride makes us long for a solution to things โ a solution, a purpose, a final cause; but the better telescopes become, the more stars appear.
Julian BarnesMost people, in my opinion, steal much of what they are. If they didn't what poor items they would be.
Julian BarnesIs despair wrong? Isnโt it the natural condition of life after a certain age? โฆ After a number of events, what is there left but repetition and diminishment? Who wants to go on living? The eccentric, the religious, the artistic (sometimes); those with a false sense of their own worth. Soft cheeses collapse; firm cheeses endurate. Both go mouldy.
Julian BarnesThat's one of the central problems of history, isn't it, sir? The question of subjective versus objective interpretation, the fact that we need to know the history of the historian in order to understand the version that is being put in front of us.
Julian BarnesDid you know that there is no exact rhyme in the Russian language for the word 'pravda'? Ponder and weigh this insufficiency in your mind. Doesn't that just echo down the canyons of your soul?
Julian Barnes..books look as if they contain knowledge, while e-readers look as if they contain information.
Julian Barnes(on grief) And you do come out of it, thatโs true. After a year, after five. But you donโt come out of it like a train coming out of a tunnel, bursting through the downs into sunshine and that swift, rattling descent to the Channel; you come out of it as a gull comes out of an oil-slick. You are tarred and feathered for life.
Julian BarnesThough why should we expect age to mellow us? If it isn't life's business to reward merit, why should it be life's business to give us warm comfortable feelings towards its end? What possible evolutionary purpose could nostalgia serve?
Julian BarnesThe writer has little control over personal temperament, none over historical moment, and is only partly in charge of his or her own aesthetic.
Julian BarnesAnd that was all the part of it - the way you were obliged to live. You stifled a groan, you lied about your love, you deceived your legal wife, and all in the name of honour. That was the damned paradox of it - in order to behave well, you have to behave badly.
Julian BarnesBut Iโve been turning over in my mind the question of nostalgia, and whether I suffer from it. I certainly donโt get soggy at the memory of some childhood knickknack; nor do I want to deceive myself sentimentally about something that wasnโt even true at the timeโlove of the old school, and so on. But if nostalgia means the powerful recollection of strong emotionsโand a regret that such feelings are no longer present in our livesโthen I plead guilty.
Julian BarnesHe thought of trying to explain something he had recently noticed about himself: that if anyone insulted him, or one of his friends, he didn't really mind--or not much, anyway. Whereas if anyone insulted a novel, a story, a poem that he loved, something visceral and volcanic occurred within him. He wasn't sure what this might mean--except perhaps that he had got life and art mixed up, back to front, upside down.
Julian BarnesWe live on the flat, on the level, and yet - and so - we aspire. Groundlings, we can sometimes reach as far as the gods. Some soar with art, others with religion; most with love. But when we soar, we can also crash. There are few soft landings. We may find ourselves bouncing across the ground with leg-fracting force, dragged towards some foreign railway line. Every love story is a potential grief story. If not at first, then later. If not for one, then for the other. Sometimes, for both.
Julian BarnesBut life never lets you go, does it? You can't put down life the way you put down a book.
Julian BarnesI hate the way the English have of not being serious about being serious, I really hate it.
Julian BarnesThe more you learn, the less you fear. "Learn" not in the sense of academic study, but in the practical understanding of life.
Julian BarnesHis air of failure had nothing desperate about it; rather, it seemed to stem from an unresented realisation that he was not cut out for success, and his duty was therefore to ensure only that he failed in the correct and acceptable fashion.
Julian BarnesDiscovering, for example, that as witnesses to your life diminish, there is less corroboration, and therefore less certainty, as to what you are or have been. [p. 65]
Julian BarnesYou put together two people who have not been put together before. Sometimes it is like that first attempt to harness a hydrogen balloon to a fire balloon: do you prefer crash and burn, or burn and crash? But sometimes it works, and something new is made, and the world is changed. Then, at some point, sooner or later, for this reason or that, one of them is taken away. and what is taken away is greater than the sum of what was there. this may not be mathematically possible; but it is emotionally possible.
Julian Barnes