Pigeons: They've got wings, but they walk a lot.

When you've been on a programme called 'An Idiot Abroad' job offers aren't exactly flying in.

The Web is the new book though, innit?

I don't know why small chocolates are called fun-sized; I mean, if I called a midget fun-sized, they'd kick off.

There was always something. It's like with this one, there's always something that's mad that I look back on it and go, that's pretty amazing to say that I've done that or been there.

Does the brain control you or are you controlling the brain? I don't know if I'm in charge of mine.

It's easier to have a go at something again when you failed at it as you've got nowt to lose.