When I see you, I smile. When I touch you, I feel you. When I kiss you, I love you!

Well, my whole thing with gossip is I couldn't care less if it's true.

My act has always reflected what's going on in my life.

I don't like doing movies, period. Movies are hard. I like TV.

I have a no-apology policy. No apologies for jokes. I apologize in my real life all the time. I say ridiculous things, I make mistakes constantly. But when I'm on stage, I'm at a microphone it's a joke!

It was sweaty Whitney (Houston) in Central Park. She knew that park pretty well. Every bush!

I was a soccer cheerleader. It doesn't get nerdier than that. I was fired from the soccer cheerleading squad after one year, which I believe to this day is unprecedented. You have to understand, no one went to the soccer games. In fact, I believe part of my duties as a cheerleader was to bake brownies for the team.