As a breastfeeding mother you are basically just meals on heels.

Believe me, having a teenage daughter is like living with the Taliban.

Men think monogamy is something you make dining tables out of.

If he wants breakfast in bed, tell him to sleep in the kitchen.

Love is like a tide. When it's in, everything looks beautiful and inviting. Only when love recedes can you see the debris beneath the surface - the old bottles, the rusty prams, the sewage pipes, the bloated cats and dogs weighted down to drown. The man I had once loved so passionately I now saw as weak, gutted like a fish.

Women want to be treated as equals, not sequels.

It's a mystery of parenthood that your son can give mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to a stray, worm-riddled dog, share a piece of re-chewed gum from a kid with bronchitis and pick his nose and eat it on a regular basis, yet won't sit next to his sister because of 'Girl Germs'.