The name Kylie can be used for Scrabble, as it is an aboriginal word for boomerang. Which is why Ms Minogue is so good at comebacks.

Basically it's just a whole bunch of blokes standing around scratching themselves

. . . planning a brilliant menu and preparing it beautifully doesn't guarantee a recipe for success.

In Hollywood a romantic man is one who talks to you after sex.

It's a mystery of parenthood that your son can give mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to a stray, worm-riddled dog, share a piece of re-chewed gum from a kid with bronchitis and pick his nose and eat it on a regular basis, yet won't sit next to his sister because of 'Girl Germs'.

Age to women is what kryptonite is to Superman. Inside every older woman is a younger woman screaming, 'Get me the hell outta here.'

Every woman wants to be wanted - just not by the entire Metropolitan police force.