living with a teenage daughter is like living with the Taliban a mum is not allowed to laugh, sing, dance or wear short skirts

Anyone living in Los Angeles who says they don't need a psychiatrist, needs a psychiatrist.

I am allergic to domestic goddesses. Men would prefer a woman with a dirty mind to a clean house.

As a breastfeeding mother you are basically just meals on heels.

I speak as your native guide to the mysterious tribe called the English. Dress code is everything. You can be a card-carrying Nazi, you can pay gigolos to eat gnocchi out of your navel and you won't be pilloried -- as long as you never, ever wear linen with tweed.

People who say that money can't buy happiness just don't know where to shop.

What creates a writer is huge, psychological dysfunction.