Fun is like life insurance; the older you get, the more it costs.

Executive: a man who makes quick decisions and is sometimes right.

A sympathizer is a fellow that's for you as long as it doesn't cost anything.

It's the good loser who finally loses out.

The worst feature of a new baby is its mother's singing.

I never saw an athletic girl that thought she was strong enough to do indoor work.

The longer it takes you to select a cantaloupe, the worse it is!