The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.
If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest.
Of all the unbearable nuisances, the ignoramus that has traveled is the worst.
About the only thing we have left that actually discriminates in favor of the plain people is the stork.
Men are not punished for their sins, but by them.
The fellow that owns his own home is always just coming out of a hardware store.