Some women were talking about how I put out. And that's just not that case. I don't put out - unless I'm asked very, very politely, and that's not putting out, that's just giving in.

No one knows who the real me is, so I can be a hundred different kinds of me.

I prefer writing for myself to perform, I guess. But if I had to choose, I'd rather perform in someone's movie than write a movie for someone else.

You know, quite a few species of fish require two or more sexual partners.

The service at this airport restaurant is so bad I'm starting to panic that I'm a ghost.

You're looking good today Bret. Very hot... hotter than Jemaine. You have a refined bone structure, while Jemaine's facial features are too deep set to be classically handsome.

A kiss is like a fight, with mouths.