If you are feeling overly optimistic the Republican Candidates Debate is on.

The torture that they are coming up with in China is so creative. They have this other method where they'll take a bamboo and they'll plant it in your anus and just let it grow. So patient. Man, watch out for China, I say. They have all the ambition as we do but none of the heart.

Still blows my mind that toilet paper isn't free.

No one knows who the real me is, so I can be a hundred different kinds of me.

Oh man, the car could just burst into flames right now and this would be the way to go, huh guys?

I mean if you two were to make love, that would be gay. Two men touching each other physically and emotionally...erotically caressing each other...on the hood of a car...or the back of a movie theater.

You're looking good today Bret. Very hot... hotter than Jemaine. You have a refined bone structure, while Jemaine's facial features are too deep set to be classically handsome.