Just because I'm married to Doug doesn't mean I can't be here for you.

I think I've always had a disconnect from what I'm supposed to be like.

I'm so happy to be around people. I just really like people, and being a freelancer can be lonely during the day, when you're at home trying to write anything you can.

The torture that they are coming up with in China is so creative. They have this other method where they'll take a bamboo and they'll plant it in your anus and just let it grow. So patient. Man, watch out for China, I say. They have all the ambition as we do but none of the heart.

This is very ambitious, but I don't care. I'm just gonna go ahead and find Amelia Earhart. Every day that goes by, I just fear the worst for her.

Sarcasm doesn't read sarcastic in print.

I'm just happy our nations are on the same page of keeping shitty reality TV on the air. Small world!