Fingernails are for opening things and toenails are for storing precious minerals off the ground.

I would imagine that Bret would taste like a warm goat cheese, and Jemaine would taste like harvati with dill. Hmm...I'm hungry actually.

Mel: What was your name again? Rain: Rain. Mel: Oh that's nice. Kind of like bad weather.

If I'm having a fancy glass of champagne, I'll always mix it with the champagne of beers. Because I deserve all the champagnes.

I used to carry a rabbit's foot for luck. Then it was a monkey's paw. Now it's a camel's toe.

I'm just happy our nations are on the same page of keeping shitty reality TV on the air. Small world!

I think growing up on a farm in a certain amount of isolation, with not a lot of friends nearby, makes you entertain yourself and kind of grows your imagination - being alone is quite good for all that. You make up stories, talk to the animals, let them be an audience, a bunch of cows.