I mean if you two were to make love, that would be gay. Two men touching each other physically and emotionally...erotically caressing each other...on the hood of a car...or the back of a movie theater.

I would love for people to know that the label feminist is something that everyone should wear proudly, because it just means that you support women.

I would like to be known as someone who was really sweet but also knowledgeable in all areas of life.

I diagnosed my loneliness as premature empty nest syndrome.

All the best movies are the ones that are cut from a more middle ground.

The torture that they are coming up with in China is so creative. They have this other method where they'll take a bamboo and they'll plant it in your anus and just let it grow. So patient. Man, watch out for China, I say. They have all the ambition as we do but none of the heart.

Just because I'm married to Doug doesn't mean I can't be here for you.