Everybody's trying to leave their mark on the world. That's why there's graffiti and babies.

I'm so happy to be around people. I just really like people, and being a freelancer can be lonely during the day, when you're at home trying to write anything you can.

Mel: What was your name again? Rain: Rain. Mel: Oh that's nice. Kind of like bad weather.

I wanted to make sure that my act was family friendly for tonight, but I don't have babies. So I thought that maybe I could pretend that I had babies and that way I could appeal to the people in the audience who have babies and to the people who like to pretend that they have babies.

As you can see, I speak many languages, including the language of sex.

Still blows my mind that toilet paper isn't free.

You know, quite a few species of fish require two or more sexual partners.