If we lacked imagination enough to foresee something better, life would indeed be a tragedy.

We hate to have some people give us advice because we know how badly they need it themselves.

I inherited my ability from both parents; my mother's ability for spending money, and my father's ability for not earning it.

Every man serves a useful purpose: a miser, for example, makes a wonderful ancestor.

Everyone rises to their level of incompetence.

Education is a method whereby one acquires a higher grade of prejudices.

America is a country that doesn't know where it is going but is determined to set a speed record getting there.