A pessimist is a man who looks both ways when he crosses the street.

A bore is a person who lights up the room simply by leaving it.

Few of us ever test our powers of deduction, except when filling out an income tax form

You shouldn't punish others for your own choices.

Reality is for people who can't face drugs.

When a person puts his best foot forward and gets it stepped on, that's life.

The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway is usually a poor judge of distance.