An optimist is one who makes the best of it when he gets the worst of it.
When a New Yorker looks like he has a suntan, it's probably rust.
There are two sorts of losers - the good loser, and the one who can't act.
A lawyer is a man who helps you get what is coming to him.
Don't worry about middle age: you'll outgrow it.
A bureaucrat's idea of cleaning up his files is to make a copy of every paper before he destroys it.