Arnie has more people watching him park the car than we do out on the course.

If Jack Nicklaus had to play my tee shots, he couldn't break 80. He'd be a pharmacist with a string of drugstores in Ohio.

No one who ever had lessons would have a swing like mine.

Who can say I have a bad swing? The only thing that matters in golf is the score you put on the board. You don't have to look pretty out there, you have to win. Look at my record and tell me who has a better swing than mine.

I'm really going to do my homework. I'm going to be down there on the practice tee finding out if a guy's wife beat him up the night before, important stuff like that. Stuff that people want to know.

Putts get real difficult the day they hand out the money.

To me, the [British] Open is the tournament I would come to if I had to leave a month before and swim over.